Do your friends and family know you keep this
journal/read it? If
so have
you had any really negative experiences as a result?
If not why?
Yes they all know. My grandmother and mother were
a little concerned
that I kept this public window into my life, but I
think they have
calmed down now. Some friends I have in real life
read it. My boyfriend
knows about it, and has permission to read it, but
I don't think he
does.
I've had some negative experiences, yes. This journal is written by me, and this by extension is a subjective view of happenings around me. I don't believe in the "if you know me go away or don't get mad if you read something you don't like" notices some people have posted all over their journals. It should be obvious that it is subjective. I'd like to think that when friends read the journal they think about what they are reading, but I know this isn't the case.
There have been several little upsets recently when they have read something they haven't liked. I find it really frustrating, because most of the time I am self-censoring to a certain degree anyhow, so to be forced to censor further (and I would never write anything truly horrible about someone in my public journal) chafes a bit. Sometimes I would like to say "don't read it then". However, that can't always be done. It's a public forum, not a private scribble in a notebook, so you do have to be careful what you say.
How has the diary benefited you? Your friends? Or total strangers?
Well, it has helped me to channel off stress and hard
times by giving me an outlet in which to vent. It's helped me learn HTML
and helped me
polish my graphic manipulation skills. I can't really
say how it has
benefited my friends....perhaps it has given them
a constant sense of my
presence, even when I have been out of contact for
a couple of years
with some of them.
Total strangers? I don't know. I'd like to think that I entertain them or make them think, or teach them something they didn't know. Make their visit worthwhile. I'm not funny or angsty or anything like that so I guess it's just for 'slice of life'.
I know that my writing has improved, and having this project and routine has been beneficial for me. Knowing that people are reading and like what they read enough to keep coming back is addictive. Truly a drug.
Has your diary ever gotten you in trouble? If so, how? Scenerio: If you were wronged by a person that you know reads your diary, would you bash them anyway? What about family? What about co-workers?
See above. Yes it has. I said something once as a
joke (that the
individual in question had said before himself) and
then one friend read
it, told everyone else about it and then they proceeded
to treat me like
dirt. I think they still are mad about that. What
can I do? Nothing. I
apologized, even though I don't think I said anything
horrible.
There have been several other cases when I really needed to vent after some behaviour by the aformentioned friends but I had to self-censor and not write about it. That rankled, but in the interest of keeping the peace, I suppose it was necessary.
If you had to do it over again from the beginning, what
would you change?
Well, I'd probably go anonymous and not tell people
I come into contact
with every day about it. Then I would be free to write
about whatever I
choose. It's not a big deal though. If I feel strongly
enough about
something I'll be writing about it, no matter who
reads it.
Do you have any favorite entries?
None really come to mind. Some that I like rereading
just for
entertainment value are my first ones (July-Sept 98)
when I was working
as a telephone operator for Bell Canada. I can see
my mental state at
the time quite clearly in the writing. Some of it
makes me cringe. I was
working nights and trying to sleep during the day.
I tried to write
every day, even if I couldn't think of anything to
say. I've come a long
way since then. I think I was a little crazy at the
time due to lack of
sleep.
Another favourite series is the "Stones and Bones" set of entries from May 25th until June 24th or so. I was on an archaeological dig in Penetanguishene, Ontario and kept a daily record of what was happening. I reread them occasionally to remember what it was like being there. It's funny how much I've forgotten already. Rereading what I wrote at the time brings it all back. I still have to put up the last 10 entries....I have the sheets of scribbled notes around here somewhere....
